Second BA’s,clipping,craniotomy alone and afraid

I am less than month from second BA’s,clipping,craniotomy. I have never been so alone and afraid .:worried:

The waiting is so hard. I am sorry you feel alone and afraid, but you do have this forum here of people who know and care. I wish you the best with your surgery.

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Waiting is very hard. Last fall, I waited from the end of Sept. to Dec. 5 to have my aneurysm treated. With each twinge in my head, I would wonder if it was the onset of a thunderclap headache. The month will go quickly. Please do not feel alone. You will find support on this site. Sending positive vibes and hugs your way. Please keep in touch.

Thank you so so much. :revolving_hearts:

I know everyone knows how it feels to face brain aneurysms surgery. Thank you! :slight_smile:

Hello, my name is sue I’m sorry you are heading for another surgery . Please don’t be afraid. There are so many people hear for your questions and will give support to help you through.
To be honest I’d rather have a clipping than having my back surgery, I found the clipping pain was very minimal after the recouping. I also had the plate removed because it was shifting towards my eye.
I know what it feels to be alone and have surgery all you have to reach out here and I know any time someone will be with you to help,you go through this surgery. I’m sure your surgeon is great and it’s in his hands. Having a clipping in my opinion is easier it’s over and you don’t have to worry about it again as you do with going thru groin . You have to be checked more frequently . I was out in 2 days. Shopping wall mart 3rd day. Stupid but I was looking for sales.
I wish you a speedy recovery and no more surgeries.
You take care and any time you need a friend please reach out.

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I’m so sorry you are alone and afraid. I’d be there if I could! I certainly understand the fear. I was terrified but all was resolved as it should be.

Hey teresaklingbiel don’t worry we are here for you. I will be praying for you.

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I am holding your hand❤️

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Sending prayers and the warmest of thoughts to you!

Knowledge is power! How fortunate you know about your aneurysms. Think about so many who will never know until they have a major, life altering event. You are one of the fortunate ones. That’s how I look at the discovery of my aneurysm and the coiling and crainiotomy which followed. Now I have annual MRIs…while I was initially afraid of these annual visits, I now consider myself fortunate to have a MRI annually which will “catch” anything which might be bubbling up.

Take care.

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So nice to say being my second surgery,craniotomy,clipping One day at time.

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Hey Teresa,
Some people are of the opinion “Ohh your 2nd surgery? So you’ve been here before, it’ll be just like before. You’ll be OK” It’s a nice sentiment, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. And the mental stress can be MASSIVE
Neurosurgery, is a shocking assault. It’s shocking to the brain, it’s shocking to the body, it’s shocking emotionally and it’s shocking psychologically. It can shock your whole world and some people just can’t seem to grasp that. Some think of it like a broken bone where 8weeks later all is healed and all is now good. Well, don’t we wish this was the case.

Teresa, I say this above as I have had 6 neurosurgeries and it NEVER gets easier, in fact for me the 2nd was harder than the first because the first was all new, with the 2nd I knew what was coming or so I thought. I tried to gauge my 2nd against my first and yet my 2nd surgical recovery was nothing like my first. I was frustrated when my 2nd recovery took longer, months longer and even then I wasn’t back to where I was before all of this journey started. My own self expectations really got to me because I wasn’t reaching my own goals.

My Recommendations:
Number One: BE KIND TO YOURSELF!!!
Others may have expectations on how long it takes to recover, they may try to force those expectations on you. Only you know where you are at in your recovery.

Number Two: LISTEN TO YOUR BODY
when your body is giving you signals to slowdown or stop… …DO IT. Don’t push it (I didn’t do that and the consequences have been life changing)

Number Three: THIS IS YOUR JOURNEY
DO NOT be trying to gauge another’s situation with your own exactly, it will never match exactly. 2 people can have the same BA in the same location but have vastly differing outcomes. Some are good, some not so good, but self care is paramount.
You MUST take care of you.
AND it most definitely is ‘One day at time’. Some days are good, some days you wouldn’t wish it on your worst enemy and no 2 days are exactly the same. I’m sure whoever said ‘variety is the spice of life’ didn’t mean THIS :wink: It’s been over 20 years since my 1st neurosurgery and 6 years since my last neurosurgery and in that 20+years its been one hell of a roller coaster, but I learnt to manage and you will too.
But it will take time, slowly, no, I mean S L O W L Y. Don’t be trying to rush it.

Please know that we are thinking of you and please do let us know how things are travelling for you. This is not easy and we know it because we have lived it too, so come chat with us.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team

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Such great advice Merl. It is a journey and everybody’s journey is different. I hope I didn’t offend with offering up a suggestion for what works for me. I was sharing what I try to tell myself regarding my journey to help me through the anxiety my surgery caused me. It was so intense, I needed to medicate and get some counseling. I’m open about talking about it, hopefully to help others. I couldn’t focus on the good of what had happened to discover my aneurysm before it ruptured. Rather, I focused on the “what ifs” of what could have happened had it ruptured. Only two weeks before my aneurysm was discovered, my husband had just returned home after five months away due to complications from heart transplant surgery…we like to call ourselves, “the scarecrow and the tinman”. A virus attacked his heart and took him down very quickly. The anxiety was immense and paralyzing. Please know we are here to support you on your journey. Don’t let anyone tell you where you should be on that journey. Many are thinking of you. Hang in there.

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Hey Cindy,
No. No offence taken at all. As we both state ‘everybody’s journey is different’. That’s one of the great things about Ben’s Friends, we can all discuss what worked (and what hasn’t) for us. Some people will swear that treatment ‘X’ is the key for everybody, when we know that it maybe great for some and not so great for another. It’s only by sharing these differing views that a broad overview of options can be discussed and considered. Some medicos can promise miracles with a specific treatment and if that medico is the only source of information, their advise can be followed blindly. I have done this previously and then when the results did not equate, the frustration was immense. I now try to investigate treatment suggestions before jumping in blindly. What are the pros? What are the cons? What are the ‘other’ options? Some medicos don’t like that I question. But that’s often their egos being bruised. This is my health I’m worried about, not their egos. I want/need to be informed. What better way than to talk to others who have ‘Been there, done that’.

Personally I think having an initial focus on the ‘What if’s’ is normal and everybody needs to weigh up their own ‘What if’s’. Does the benefit out weigh the risks? And it’s only by discussing our own personal experiences that an informed decision can be made. So please don’t be apologising. People need the information.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team

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Sending you encouragement and prayers

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Hi Merl, thank you for this advise. I really needed to read this. I’m so ready to find this new me (new normal as the doctor told me yesterday).

Really thank you for your honesty. Because you have had the same surgery you do understand. Helps me so so much for your kindness. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

So nice for you to write back. With each person that speaks to me helps me to be more positive. Hope your doing well. Truly thankful. :relieved:

So sweet to say. :heart: