Is it normal to feel that as a care giver that every day can be a leap forward and a step backwards at the same time>
I see improvement every day. But my instincts to protect hubby from himself may be getting in the way.
How do I let go and let him live and work for his own mind?
Hi M & M! I think it is way too early to expect him to be totally self sufficient and restored. Iwould do baby steps. I am 3.5 yrs post sah level 5 (worst level) and there is still much can't do and much that caregivers aren't comfortable with such as going down the basement steps and I can understand that fortunately- i'm thankful I can comprehend danger and adjust to caregivers requests. I try to go with the flow-if it consoles them to go down the steps I let them go down to check the fuel oil for example. But it's a learning process for all those involved. For example the first time steps were a concern I was angry but kept anger inside, next time I was more understanding. Now I feel the love and concern and don't feel any negative emotions. I go down the patio steps and thru the bilco doors-this seems to put them at ease but 'm not sure why- other steps are old and wobbly but I had our builder check them out and he said they're safe. I know they aren't thrilled to see me drive the lawn tractor either but I do it anyway . Also drive the back roads to the bank whch freaks them out I think. Time and gradual independence will be the keys. It will be difficult to iron out these wrinkles and give him more clearance so I will keep you in thoughts and prayers. I hope I helped a bit-it's hard to analyze your situation from my perspective-afar. If you have any questions please feel free to write me by e-mail- i'll send a friend request to get set up just in case!-sorry so long - I could write volumes on this topic- an excellent one by the way! maybe some caregivers will give some advice I hope, there's two sides to every tale!
Hah...You are finding your way through this journey...so much for a brain aneurysm survivor in the beginning is taking one step forward and three back...I am a survivor not a caregiver, I am not sure what to tell you and hope you can get some good advice...wishing you a better day with hubby...~ Colleen