New and scared. Ruptured aneurysm and SAH. A lot of questions for Google leave me with more Q's and anxiety!

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Hi Lemon,

Sorry for the late response. I hope your recovery is continuing to go well. Having this community has been extremely helpful.

Our timeline sounds similar. I had a ruptured SAH with 3 coils inserted in mid Dec ‘23. ICU for only 10 days. Overall, I feel fortunate my recovery is going well. I returned to my remote HR job by mid January. Headaches finally subsided by the end of March. I’ve been pain med free since then.

I was also very scared and concerned about headaches and what Google says. Google helped me better understand what things could positively and negatively affect my health. I’ve adjusted accordingly.

In April, I had my 3 month angio follow up where they discovered my coils compacted and my residual annie is looking “conspicuous”. Dr. wants to stent. While I am continually concerned about what may happen, I am trying to cope by living my best life bc regardless of our health, tomorrow is never guaranteed. I’m an avid traveler. I have trips planned, people to see and things to do. Of course, I taking some precautions but I don’t want my health to limit my “living”.

Below are a few things I found helpful. I purchased an adjustable bed the day after I was discharged to keep my head elevated. Since you enjoy music…Last weekend, I attended my first indoor concert since rupture. Luckily, my friend recommended I bring ear plugs. They were 1000% needed. I didn’t need them for an outdoor concert. But, they were a must-have for indoor. I’ve flown 3 times and chewing gum during flight helped. I try to get to bed by midnight to get 7-8 hours sleep.

Wishing you all the best with your recovery.

Christina

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Hi Lemon and y’all. My name is Patty and I live in South Dakota. This post brought tears to my eyes because I too am new and scared. And I don’t want to be scared. I hate fear. It’s like a monster that will grow every time you feed into it. A little information about me and I will try not to ramble.

I started getting headaches so I went in to get checked out. 20+ years ago I got headaches and they had found two small aneurysms. We chose a wait and watch And a few years later, they told me they were just gone. OK.

Recently (last fall) started getting headaches again, so I went in to get checked, figuring that the aneurysms had come back. They did and they brought two buddies with them.

Two of them were very large and the one on the left side of my skull needed to be addressed pretty quickly. I went in for an angiogram, so they could get a better look at it, and attempted to coil it. Unfortunately, it came out and entered the bloodstream. So they stopped and went after the coil to retrieve it.

They were able to, but as they were pulling back out, and passing through my heart area, Something broke off near my heart and caused a stroke paralyzing my left side. I was in impatient rehab for a while and thank God I recovered pretty quickly considering. But we still had the aneurysms to deal with.

March 24 I went in to the hospital to have the left artery coiled and stented so that it could not come back out like it did the first time. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what it did again. Again, they were able to retrieve it, and they aborted the coiling procedure temporarily since they had not yet been able to stent it.

A few hours later it burst, and I was rushed to ICU. I won’t go into any graphic details, but it was rough at first. But they saved my life and I spent seven weeks in the hospital. I am home now. All things considering I am doing pretty well.

But I still have the other risky one on the right side of my skull. And like Lemon I’m scared. I told my doctor I don’t think I can go through this again. He said for right now we’re not gonna do anything except watch it. I go back in about six weeks for an MRI to take a look at it and the one they fixed. The other two are very small, according to him and not a huge risk right now.

It is so hard to not think, well what if this one bursts? Especially while I’m at home alone. Years ago, I had a small cerebral hematoma, and it felt like I had been shot in the head. So the thought of this one bursting terrifies me. And I don’t freaking want to live like this, in fear.

I’m also trying to understand all the symptoms and limitations or whatever you want to call them as a result of the first one bursting; The tiredness, depression, fear, etc.

So I looked up symptoms and stuff on the Internet and that’s how I found you guys. And I’m so grateful that I did! Any advice or suggestions that you can give would be Godsend.

God bless you all, I will be praying very hard for all of us. Thank you for allowing me to join you.

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Welcome (again) Patty! I can not believe how strong you are to have gone through all you have, my goodness. I can think of many things to share but I’m having a bit of trouble typing, so cliff notes version - breathe (relaxation type) @Peter has some great advice on it. Stay hydrated, eat protein, rest as needed. I give myself a set amount of time each day to acknowledge my rupture and the limitations it’s caused. The rest of my day is for me and not it.

We have several members who have ruptured and survived, I hope they come and talk to you. We are so glad you joined and remember we are here for you!

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Thank you for your response, God bless you. I think that helps to face everything when you have others alongside you that understand. I am so glad I found this site.

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Read @KrysG survival story Happy Anniversary, to each of us - #2 by Moltroub

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I understand how you feel. I was 25 when mine burst. Just when you think you know who you are and what your future plans will be, you are thrown this huge challenge. Please have patience with yourself and the healing. I never had headaches until the burst, then had then a lot for a while. Perhaps a signal of healing, perhaps a signal of fear and stress, or perhaps a signal of not drinking enough water that day. Like babies have different cries, I began learning the different headaches in me. Your body has been through a huge shock and is learning how to deal with it, so it may be sending you unclear messages. When I was confused, or scared because I was experiencing something I didn’t understand, I learned to stop. Literally. I would take quiet time, often on the floor, and would have some time talking to myself, my brain, God—just processing. Please give yourself time to process how you are feeling and what you are experiencing on your own. Without Google!! Too much information creates unrealistic expectation. Only you know how you are feeling, you can’t read about how you may be or should be feeling or what challenges you may be or should be facing. Also expect that for every few days of progress, you may have a day of set-back. That is with everything in life, but you may feel it magnified on yourself and healing right now

Take a breath. Appreciate your great strength in the survival. Rely on that strength each day while facing these unplanned for challenges. You are doing great!!!

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God bless you, thank you for such a wonderful answer. And you’re right, I need to cut myself some slack. It’s just that patience isn’t one of my strongest virtues. And to be honest, I am rather enjoying the having to rest at home for now. Although sometimes it feels kind of like being locked up in jail, lol. Can’t work, can’t drive. PT/ST/OT 3 days a week breaks up the monotony. :smirk:

Have a blessed day!

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Wow. You hit me in the face with this and now I’m crying. Same time lime. Same fear. I just hit one year on Thanksgiving and I’ve got 90% of my life back. But I’m always nervous, always asking why me. Why was I saved when so many others were not as blessed. Lemon im not much of a religious person, but there has to be a reason we where choose to live through our annerysym when others was not. Simply put…must be here for a reason or we wouldn’t be here. Your a blessed man and you now get to help others. I guess the fear of dying kinda stops once you realize you have absolutely no control in life… Enjoy every moment because it’s a blessing. I am one year into my recovery and I’m doing well physically back to cement work but mentally I’m a scared little boy half the time now. My aunt is 25 years into her recovery and is still an active nurse. We got hope. Sorry for rambling but your story got me going. Reach out any time.

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Welcome to our group Bigguns! Cement work-wow, I am impressed! Thank you for being brand new and already supporting others.

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Absolutely no problem. My story and my struggles mean absolutely nothing if I don’t use it to help comfort others. I was terrified. I couldn’t show that. As the man of the house I couldn’t let my kids and wife see I was scared. I made plans for the day after my surgery to show them how confident I was that I would survive. But inside I was as scared as could be. Untill I met this lady at a bonfire I normally would not have went to, and she had the same thing 2 years prior and she could walk and talk and was normal and it put me at such ease it was so needed. I just pray that I can give that to others. You feel so alone because no one understands what your going through.

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I do believe for everyone of us who survived our rupture, we need to Pass it On whatever “it” is, whether it’s our stories or a simple act of kindness.

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I suggest you see a neurologist as well as Your neurosurgeon. The neurologist can recommend a psychiatrist for you. My neurologist says she believes I have PTSD from the aneurysm rupture and I have looked it up and found the PTSD is very common and survivors of traumatic brain injury. I see a psychiatrist in March and I’m hoping he will put me on some medication like Prozac to help me through the scary parts. I had a head on collision in October not my fault but I feel like I’ve taken 10 steps back so I understand how you feel

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Hello Lemon, I’m Craig 66 years old. I’m from Northern Ontario Canada but my journey started in Southern Ontario approx 20 years ago. What you are feeling and thinking is not unusual. Every journey is different. The person I was 20 years ago is substantially different from today. I ruptured and bled for hours and simple circumstances prevented me from seeking help for perhaps 24 hours and by the time I was transferred around to different floors stages and finally to the last “specialty” center 40 miles away I was fortunate to have a dime sized aneurysms coiled and smaller aneurysm discovered. I lost about a week or 2 in time at that point. Flashes of memory - mostly frightening. I woke one time with my wife and daughter leaning over me. One of them said “ you had a aneurism that burst - a brain bleed” I was pretty heavily sedated but I managed to say “people die from that” one of them said “nobody is dieing around here” and meds were pushed again and I was lost into sedation world. I “woke up” maybe a week later full of tubes gadgets monitors lines and many people around me including a male nurse who was attempting to wash my face. I noticed my elderly father counting all the lines monitors and gadgets rather than showing surprise he was amazed - back to deep sedation world. Different place next time I woke up. This time just a nurse and my wife. Perhaps 2 or 3 weeks later. It was time for some testing. Flash cards for Recognition. I was not positive who my wife was but when they showed me a flash card of a washing machine and dryer I told them what they were. My wife excitedly said he must be better. He didn’t know what they are before the burst! They both laughed as I wondered what was so funny. This is when my recovery truly started. Long story short - it took months to let my brain heal. It actually probably took 2 years. I consider myself very fortunate as should you. I hope with all my heart you get back and up and going after what will eventually be just a life experience. Don’t sweat the small stuff. I did and it was not productive. I tore through statistics. I lived the poor me for way too long. Please just let this long note offer you comfort in any way it can. Bottom line - 20 years later - maybe a dozen coilings, stents, procedures etc and it’s just a life experience now. Does it enter my life still? Yes. I try not to let it but it does. In those 20 years eventually I was back running my business. Raising my kids etc etc etc. I now enjoy a quiet life in a little town of 1200 people and could not be happier. Chin up. Roll with the punches-you got this thing - Craig

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I was going to recommend that for her because it was suggested to me right after I started my recovery. The fear symptoms became so intense, my depression and anxiety skyrocketed. I completely understand what she’s going through. My neurologist, neurosurgeon, & doctor all referred me to go see a psychiatrist.

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Hello Lemon,

You’re not alone—we’ve got you. Thank God you have such a great community surrounding you, filled with people who support, uplift, and truly listen. I understand what you’re going through because I’ve been there myself—and in many ways, I still am.

I suffered a ruptured aneurysm on July 5, 2022. All I remember was an unbearable pain, so intense I couldn’t sit or stand. I whispered for my husband to call 911, collapsed, and in between screaming from the pain, I kept calling out for Jesus—at least, that’s what my husband told me.

The next morning, I had surgery to fix it with coiling. A few days later, I needed another surgery to relieve the pressure building in my brain. That second one was incredibly painful—I’m not sure why, maybe because a different surgeon performed it. Walking was a struggle, even with a walker, but I had to push through just so I could go home and start therapy.

After 21 days, I finally left the hospital and returned home, but that’s when everything crashed down on me. The “what ifs” haunted me—what if it happens again and I’m alone? What if it happens while I’m sleeping, in the shower? The fear and anxiety were overwhelming. I searched for support groups, for people who truly understood, but there weren’t many resources out there. Even my therapist tried to find something local for me and came up empty.

I can’t drive anymore because too much sensory input overwhelms me, affecting me cognitively. I hate relying on others, yet that’s become my reality. It made finding and attending group meetings even harder. So when I finally found this community, it was a blessing. Even though life gets busy and I haven’t always checked in, I know this space is here, and that means everything.

The past few years since my aneurysm have felt like an endless cycle of specialists and doctor visits. It gets exhausting, I know but it does get better.

Breathe in: positivity
Breathe out: negativity

My new goal is to focus on healthy, clean living and to stay hydrated. The only major thing that happened in 2024 was needing a stent after my MRA showed a small new blood clot forming within or underneath the coils. It feels like every appointment brings something new—like the universe is testing me, trying to bring me down.

But I refuse to let it. Not today, Satan!

An aneurysm is a disease, but the good news is that it can be managed if we take care of ourselves—physically, mentally, and spiritually. More importantly, we need to check in on each other, offer support, share what helps us, and lift one another up. And if prayer is part of your life, praying for each other makes a difference, too.

Sorry for rambling on, and thank you for listening. Sending you love and prayers. God bless.

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After I ruptured, I was told not to drive until I felt comfortable as a passenger which took awhile. I was able to drive the backroads a couple miles to PT because those roads rarely have traffic. I also could drive to my parents at specific times a mile or so south of us, the hardest was getting out on the four lane to make the almost immediate left turn. I’m still picky on when I drive, I do best on overcast days worse with bright sunlight, headlights, rain or the rare snow can all make me pull over. It’s taken years to get to this point, hang in there.