i haven't been here in a very long time. i wanted to be here to support others dealing w/the after affects of a brain aneurysm and/or stroke but i just can't seem to come to grips w/it myself. this past november, it's been 2 years since my aneurysm was coiled and i had a stroke on the operating table. i didn't have it as bad as many but i still can't seem to find my way out of the fog. 2 angiograms later and the aneurysm hasn't changed but my life has. i no longer have a quarter of the energy i once had and i'm always so sad. my husband wants a divorce b/c i guess i'm not what he signed up for 23 years ago and i cannot process any of it. i am still struggling to feel normal again and now i'm in a nasty custody battle for our 3 young children.
i'm so damn tired of the struggle. it never seems to get better.
I wish I could tell you what the magic bullet is to 'get right' and lift the fog, thing is I don't have any answers but I'm here to tell you, I feel for you.
Peace to you as you get thru this bumpy time in the road,
thanks ya'll. one of the problems is - they're trying to use the aneurysm and stroke against me to say i'm incapable of caring for my children. i've been caring for them all this time but apparently, my health can be used against me. i did fall into a deep depression this past spring and quit taking care of myself but i still took care of my kiddos. someone recently pointed me in the direction of 2 neurological psychiatrists who help brain injury patients. i had no idea neurological psychiatry even existed however, i was very upset to learn that one of the only 2 doctors remotely close to me is the same psychiatrist i've been seeing for about 9 years now. he knows what i've been through yet never worked w/me to deal w/the after effects. he just gives me the same antidepressant and sends me on my way. i have an appointment w/him in a few weeks and will ask him why he hasn't worked w/me to deal w/the after effects.
thank you for hearing me vent. it's so painful to realize what i've been through can be used against me in court to lose my kids when i'd give anything to have the old me back. i didn't ask for this, none of us did. who would? a supportive husband would've made a world of difference.
Awe, Kathy ~ I am so sorry that you are going through this. I pray that the courts see that you are a good mom and can take care of your children. I can't imagine if your husband doesn't want to hang out and take responsibility for helping you through this, that he will truly want the responsibility of raising your 3 children. You are certain in a very tough situation. Not something any of us have signed up for.
We are all here for you, please visit often.
I will continue to lift this situation up in prayer.
hi Kathy! don't be sorry- we understand-even i with no children can understand your hiatus and my hats off to you raising 3 young ones- that is a great feat for non anuerysmals! if the anti depressants aren't working ask for a change in meds and or dosage. Throw the negative stuff right out the window and focus on the positives-one is you took care of your kids even during the spring depression!!! that's extraordinary!! many would fail at this point and i'm sure the courts will agree that this proves you are most capable of caring for the children, keep happy and keep fighting the good fight, number one priority is the children and you are already doing that, sorry your husband isn't more aware and supportive, others just don't get it and the only way for them to show understanding and a little compassion is to go thru this themselves which i would never wish on anyone, keeping you in thoughts and prayers for healing of minds, bodies and souls and the marriage~~~
I'm 2 years too and it can still be a struggle not being the 'normal' me. I feel for you. I pray the courts will do the best thing for you and your children and that you will begin to see a light at the end of the tunnel.