Everything seems to take so long but I mentioned the Regional Brain Injury Service awhile ago but because of this and that , my case was just heard this morning by the board. Good news, I've been accepted into the program. I'm eager to get some help with my weak areas and try to over come them or at least, become stronger in communications, memory , controlling my anger all of that stuff. I see my family Dr. next week and well, I hope to also get additional assistance.
I've been feeling isolated. Feelings of "you don't understand" are more frequent. I'm quick to anger. Example, I had water in a glass, sitting outside with my husband and son, along with our two dogs. Sounds great right? Yes it was! I finished my water and looked at the glass, my immediate thought was "I'd like to smash this glass on the walkway". I couldn't get this out of my mind but I didn't do it. I get frustrated very easily and I'm mad that I'm sitting here without any help to get better. It's like they perform brain surgery then leave you. It's like I'm sitting on a little tiny rubber raft in the middle of the ocean and have no idea where to go.
I'm venting right now. I need to know that I'm not alone with all of this. Sometimes I think my family gets sick and tired of me , they get frustrated because some days I'm slow. Some days, it takes more explaining to get me to understand something. Some days, when I try to explain things it takes a bit of time to find a word or remember something. I just need people to understand and there are days that I feel that's a hopeless need.
Thanks for being here BAF. Even if just to let me ramble.
Thinking of you all out there....
it sounds like ur seeing a light at the end of the tunnel…you were accepted to a program thats gonna give u the help ur needing…that seems very optomistic…wish ur family was more supportive…i have found that if i dont tell them wats going on they cant have some empathy for how im feeling…i hope things change for u so u can move forward to a more positive recovery…stay strong n positive,prayers goin up 4 ya…michelle-n-texas
Tina...we could benefit greatly from being neighbors...to hold hands and give hugs...we are not, except for here on this site...I am delighted you are accepted into the RBIS... and I pray that it is so helpful to you.
Here in WA ST, limited recovery was made available to me...I was too brain damaged/limited to even question it ...That does not take away pain and emotional trauma for you immediately; tho cherish, respect the fine help who have provided/promoted your acceptance/approval into RBIC...you are blessed in that.
When you have time (forgive me if you have and my memory blanked) more about you and your family...
If you are married, ask your hubby to please get involved here...so many spouses here have been so giving / caring / supportive...and share their frustrations... I beg, plead of you to recognize the impact on spouse/ family who know little more than we individuals do... I can only imagine how I would be as the spouse...vs the the survivor...You need the support/understanding...a/w/a he/they do...i.e children / parents / siblings...
Blessings / prayers to you...so hope you will continue w/updates...we care so much... on recovery of one another... it provides/supports promise to each of us...
I am very happy to be finally getting some help. I guess my frustration comes from, if it wasn't for me doing the leg work, I'd still be left to sit and recover and deal with the issues that come with that. I've been very angry that , brain surgery is done and then ....nothing! I have deficits that I"m not about to accept into my life from here on out, so the question of the day was, WHO and WHERE do I get further help for the brain injury?? They fix you up by performing surgery and send you on your way. So much more that we go through than that. A check up with our neurosurgeon every 6 weeks or whatever, isn't all that I need. I'm sure I speak for all of us if not, most of us. So even though yes, I'm glad the ball is at least starting to move, I'm still angry that it's taken so long and that it had to be ME to get the ball rolling. Otherwise, I would just sit and accept and don't even bother trying to explain how I feel to anyone. It gets tiresome. I get a headache if I talk too much. LOL
I must sound resentful and maybe I am to a degree. Just not sure why. I don't have all the answers yet because I would have hoped to be feeling back to my old self by now. That's not the case.
Still venting.... :-(