Hi everyone, I’m fairly new here and am having some issues I was hoping some of you may be able to give me insight on. I had a ruptured anuerysm/SAH back in April 2013 and crainotomy/clipping to repair the anuerysm followed a few weeks later by a VP shunt to resolve my hydrocephalus. In January 2014 my surgeon coiled a second anuerysm that surgery went very well. In addition to the constant headaches that I am still dealing with and the fatigue I get I have noticed that lately my mood is much different than it used to be. I get very stressed and anxious about nearly everything I have to do even simple tasks that I can complete without much trouble. In addition to this and more difficult to deal with is that I have no patience for anyone or any situation, now I was never the most patient person but I did have a reasonable level of patience, I have 2 small children and have no patience for them or my husband anymore. My husband reminds me of this daily and asks me if I realize that I’m always yelling at everyone this has been going on for some time but recently I’ve really noticed that he is right. Has anyone else had issues like this? Is it something that will improve with time? I have almost totally recovered but being so angry all the time really makes me feel terrible. I would greatly appreciate any thing you could share with me. I just want to know if its just me or is this as common as fatigue among us survivors.
Thanks Jo, I was just wondering if there was something wrong with me. My mom had a ruptured Annie back in 2003 and she hasn’t had any of the issues I’ve had so I always feel like something is wrong with me. I just feel awful my family has been so good to me and taken such good care of me and I can’t seem to do that for them anymore. But thank you so much for your comments.
You are definitely not alone. The damaging effects of the sah seem to play a role in anger management, but usually I am provoked to anger- like cops bringing home kid at 2 am etc etc but there was un called for times I over reacted like when I have to say something 3 times. There are so many factors that contribute to "losing it" and I believe fatigue is one of them. Your husband must think your anger is excessive to comment so I would work on that with him and ask for his help to assist in addressing issues that are triggering anger episodes perhaps? Good Communication is key and its a work in progress for sure, but it does get better- its almost like starting over and we are in the terrible two's stage learning how to deal with anger-lol. I did not need professional help or meds but everyone is different, and if things get worse please seek professional help starting at your family dr- don't be shy or embarrased- you have been thru ww3 and back- it's not your fault, theres a great article on here entitled this ones for us, I will look for it for you, anyways hang in there things will most likely improve ~~ps in regard to your reply to xoxo- I think it depends on the area of the brain that the bleed affects- my fuse was definitely made smaller-lol
I keep coming back to read your message. I didn't respond because I didn't think I had any words of wisdom but I know sometimes it's hard to share and not know if you will receive any response at all. So I'm back to add two cents. First I applaud you for caring enough to try to correct something you feel is hurting your family. You recognized the behavior so that's a start right? I sometimes catch myself feeling bits of anger but in my case it's when I'm hungry or tired and don't recognize that I am. I get the dips in mood when I start worrying too much so I finally decided to talk to a therapist who helped me understand it's normal. Plus I keep yapping here and everyone here helps me understand even further. And finally, I decided that it's up to me to try to balance my moods to keep my body healthy enough to avoid any crazy spikes in blood pressure. Well that's what I tell myself anyway ;)
hi again Cassie, I found it! I hope it helps your household~~http://www.bafsupport.org/profiles/blogs/this-one-is-for-us
Love this Ron! Terrible twos for sure!
Thank you! This is the most amazing thing I have ever read, it is so very true everything I’ve ever felt and not known how to put into words. Thank you all for your support and encouragement all the comments have been so helpful!
You have received much support on the subject...but no you are not alone...~ Colleen
Cassie...
Did you have your symptoms after the open surgery/clip...or after the minimally invasive coil/stent?
I had coil/stents...have a strong interest in this due to our brain anatomy of the access route of the minimally invasive procedure...to reach an aneurysm... around/thru the anatomy of our sphenoid bone, the structures in our limbic system (aka the "emotion brain") and (or including) our hippocampus that are in the medial temporal lobe...arteries that carry the equipment and devices run thru these areas reaching the aneurysms...(as I understand/comprehend it...I have no expertise) ...
I have so much hope that our family members will begin asking their neuro-docs about it...
Hugs
Pat
I’ve noticed it more since the coiling. When I first came home from the clipping surgery I remember my husband laughing that I was nicer than before! Since I don’t remember much from that initial time home it’s hard to be sure but I’ve noticed it more since the coiling not a scientific assessment by any means but it’s what I remember.
Cassie...when you have time...may be great to ask hubby of his memory...a/w/a other family/friends...
Thanks for sharing...prayers you will have step by step recovery...ask your docs about therapies, etc...attempt asking them about the limbic/hippocampus...etc...
After my rupture my doctor told my wife “no one comes out of this the same”. He was correct. I have tried and tried but I am no longer the same person. I never yelled and still don’t, but I have little patience for little annoyances. My wife says “boy, everything bothers you”. What she doesn’t know is much more actually bothers me but I try real hard to conceal it. This has gotten better over time.
As for the anxiety, I was damn near paralyzed with fear when going to a doctor or hospital after the rupture. I had repeated anxiety attacks for the first few months and was on medication. That too has subsided to the point that it rarely ever happens.
If I had any advice it would be, get professional help for your anger and mood problem. Don’t wait! Let them know you probably have a form of Post-traumatic Stress and they will guide you thought it and save your family a lot of heartache. Best of luck!
Tony, I can really relate to your first paragraph there!
Hi huny I am new on here to and sometimes I experience mood changes to. I had a ruptured aneurysm back in April 2010 and I had a coiling surgery but now on the last year of my check up they have found I still have aneurysm only this time it’s inoperable so I hope and pray it never ruptures. I have a wonderful family and friends and I have a brilliant support network, but still I don’t like the moods I get in sometimes and it makes me feel so alone. I can’t cry since my surgery and I haven’t cried for over 4 years and I find it hard sometimes as I have no release so instead I get in moods but I’m still alive and I’m so greatful to the good lord allowing me to live, just find it frustrating sometimes xxxxx
I had two ruptures -both clipped Jan 2010. I too, wasn’t the most patient person in the world but it did change me. It’s now June 2014 and I am just barely coming back up out of more than a year of raging anger. I live alone and isolate because I have no patience. I absolutely hate myself like this, and my memory seems to get wise which makes patience a foregone conclusion.As of just the past two months it has quelled somewhat. I still get headaches but not as often not as long lived. It seemed that every spring if have a bout of a week to ten day continuous one. Thank God it was down to four days this year.
Not sure about advice, but I do relate. I still get terrified when the headaches change and last for any length of time. Taking anti depressant and mood stabilizer…they help a little. I’ve kind of given up on ever being not angry just under the surface.
Blessings and love to you all…"we do the best with what we got."
Kathy