Interesting point Alice. Procrastination or delay? I question myself all the time because of what’s happened and that in itself causes delay. I think we owe it to ourselves to slow down on everything.
Lisa
Alice....I have always been a bit of a procrastinator, but more so after the SAH. I experience the inability to make decisions quite a bit. I can make a decision, it just takes me a little bit of time. I've been trying to be more aware, and I find I am MUCH better at completing tasks and "using my brain" after I've been awake for a couple of hours, then...in the afternoon, late afternoon, I find my brain has had about all it can take for the day...dependent on how much I've had to use my brain. (people who have never been through what we've experienced would probably get a good laugh at what we post....like I can only use my brain for important things just a few hours each day!!) What a relief to be able to "talk" to people who know exactly what you've been through!
I am still taking an anti-depressant...Zoloft. I take 150 mg. a day....100 mg. in the morning and 50 mg at bedtime. I'd been on the Lexapro for some time, so I believe (as well as my doc) that it had run it's course of effectiveness for me. I really like Zoloft. It has made a big difference for me. My primary doctor prescribed Cymbalta and I felt nothing after a month. I see a therapist (at times) and she referred me to a psychiatrist who prescribed the Zoloft. She explained to me that Lexapro and Cymbalta are in the same "class"...so if Lexapro had run it's course, then the Cymbalta would likely not work/make any impact. I felt a difference within weeks of being on Zoloft.
How long ago was your SAH? I was on anti-seizure for, maybe, 6-8 weeks after the bleed. (I had a lot of issues with vasospasms while in the neuro ICU.) I didn't drive then and had to wait another month after being off of them before I could drive. Now...I have no restrictions on driving. I'm sorry that lighting is an issue for you! You're absolutely right....where can you go these days that doesn't have fluorescent lighting?? Virtually almost EVERY place uses them. That has got to be very frustrating.
If you're still experiencing any depression...ask about a drug in a different "family". We go through so much after this life altering experience...you should not have to deal with depression also. And...a full dose may make a big difference for you. I hope you keep healing and keep on keeping on. It's what we do. How nice to be with (sort of) people who know your own struggles. And...I AM going to get to the doc!!
Alice said:
Hi pixiechick! Have you always been a procrastinator, or have you become one since the SAH? I find I'm not as good at making decisions as I was before the "event." I never thought to call it procrastination, but it is a sort of delay, rather than an inability. And, since I don't like to be anywhere where there is flourescent lighting, (which is everywhere) I have to gather up all my internal strength, to do simple things like food shopping or taking the dog to the vet. Do you take anti depressants anymore? I was not on any seizure meds until I began the anti depressants. Do you drive? Here's the catch. I don't want to have a seizure while I'm driving, but I'm actually not on a full dose of anti depressant either. It's frustrating. GET TO YOUR DOC!!!!!
pixiechick66 said,Hi Alice! I was already taking Lexapro at the time of my SAH....I found I needed something else after about 3-4 months. I won't say I'm sorry you had to get a divorce, because I too divorced a "loser" (and I really hate that word but sometimes it fits!). I am happy that you are free of that negativity, though. This is a major life changing event, and if you don't have someone in your corner...it's that much more difficult. I no longer take anti-seizure meds, but.....I am, just within the past couple of months, experiencing A LOT of dizziness. I'm going to make an appointment with my neuro doc, but I find it very frustrating. I am using my cane at times, which I really don't like. I'll try to keep you posted after I see my doc...but I should warn you...I am THE master procrastinator!! I hope you receive some feedback from the site....post it as it's own question...you'll find that at least some people will be experiencing the same symptoms you are. Best of luck, Alice. Take care!!
Alice said:I went through major depression too. At first took Lexapro. As depression worsened was put on Cymbalta. In retrospect it had a lot to do with the fact that I was with a person who I divorced as soon as I was able. The antidepressant has lowered my seizure tolerance, so now I take anti-seizure meds too. The combination makes me dizzy at times. Do you or anyone have these problems?
First of all, let me apologize Pixiechick, for the, Get to the Doc, command. It was insensitive of me, and I know better, especially since I am so much like you, as regards making decisions, completing tasks, etc. It's 12 noon, and I'm still in my nightgown.
My SAH was 4 years ago. I had major vasospasm issues. Half of my skull was removed to allow my brain to swell. As my Neurosurgeon said,"Whatever could go wrong, did go wrong." There was so much bleeding my retina's filled up with blood and I became blind. Eventually they performed vitrectomy on both eyes to restore my vision. My left retina was torn and eventually detached. Even now this eye never closes completely and so is often very dry requiring eyedrops continually and an eye patch at night. Eventually, I needed cataract surgery. I have a shunt in my left temple with a tube that runs into my abdomen.
My ex tried to keep me over-medicated and over dependent. He charged me $2000 per month to take care of me! I weaned myself off of the high doses of Trazodone and Clonazepam and told him I wasn't his profit center.
Not everyone has wonderful caretakers. Anyway that's enough dirty laundry. Thanks for the info on Zoloft. I had no idea that Lexapro and Cymbalta were in the same class. You'd think my psychiatrist would know this instead of forcing me to tough it out.
pixiechick66 said:
Alice....I have always been a bit of a procrastinator, but more so after the SAH. I experience the inability to make decisions quite a bit. I can make a decision, it just takes me a little bit of time. I've been trying to be more aware, and I find I am MUCH better at completing tasks and "using my brain" after I've been awake for a couple of hours, then...in the afternoon, late afternoon, I find my brain has had about all it can take for the day...dependent on how much I've had to use my brain. (people who have never been through what we've experienced would probably get a good laugh at what we post....like I can only use my brain for important things just a few hours each day!!) What a relief to be able to "talk" to people who know exactly what you've been through!I am still taking an anti-depressant...Zoloft. I take 150 mg. a day....100 mg. in the morning and 50 mg at bedtime. I'd been on the Lexapro for some time, so I believe (as well as my doc) that it had run it's course of effectiveness for me. I really like Zoloft. It has made a big difference for me. My primary doctor prescribed Cymbalta and I felt nothing after a month. I see a therapist (at times) and she referred me to a psychiatrist who prescribed the Zoloft. She explained to me that Lexapro and Cymbalta are in the same "class"...so if Lexapro had run it's course, then the Cymbalta would likely not work/make any impact. I felt a difference within weeks of being on Zoloft.
How long ago was your SAH? I was on anti-seizure for, maybe, 6-8 weeks after the bleed. (I had a lot of issues with vasospasms while in the neuro ICU.) I didn't drive then and had to wait another month after being off of them before I could drive. Now...I have no restrictions on driving. I'm sorry that lighting is an issue for you! You're absolutely right....where can you go these days that doesn't have fluorescent lighting?? Virtually almost EVERY place uses them. That has got to be very frustrating.
If you're still experiencing any depression...ask about a drug in a different "family". We go through so much after this life altering experience...you should not have to deal with depression also. And...a full dose may make a big difference for you. I hope you keep healing and keep on keeping on. It's what we do. How nice to be with (sort of) people who know your own struggles. And...I AM going to get to the doc!!
Alice said:Hi pixiechick! Have you always been a procrastinator, or have you become one since the SAH? I find I'm not as good at making decisions as I was before the "event." I never thought to call it procrastination, but it is a sort of delay, rather than an inability. And, since I don't like to be anywhere where there is flourescent lighting, (which is everywhere) I have to gather up all my internal strength, to do simple things like food shopping or taking the dog to the vet. Do you take anti depressants anymore? I was not on any seizure meds until I began the anti depressants. Do you drive? Here's the catch. I don't want to have a seizure while I'm driving, but I'm actually not on a full dose of anti depressant either. It's frustrating. GET TO YOUR DOC!!!!!
pixiechick66 said,Hi Alice! I was already taking Lexapro at the time of my SAH....I found I needed something else after about 3-4 months. I won't say I'm sorry you had to get a divorce, because I too divorced a "loser" (and I really hate that word but sometimes it fits!). I am happy that you are free of that negativity, though. This is a major life changing event, and if you don't have someone in your corner...it's that much more difficult. I no longer take anti-seizure meds, but.....I am, just within the past couple of months, experiencing A LOT of dizziness. I'm going to make an appointment with my neuro doc, but I find it very frustrating. I am using my cane at times, which I really don't like. I'll try to keep you posted after I see my doc...but I should warn you...I am THE master procrastinator!! I hope you receive some feedback from the site....post it as it's own question...you'll find that at least some people will be experiencing the same symptoms you are. Best of luck, Alice. Take care!!
Alice said:I went through major depression too. At first took Lexapro. As depression worsened was put on Cymbalta. In retrospect it had a lot to do with the fact that I was with a person who I divorced as soon as I was able. The antidepressant has lowered my seizure tolerance, so now I take anti-seizure meds too. The combination makes me dizzy at times. Do you or anyone have these problems?
Alice....don't you worry even a little tiny bit regarding the doc comment! Shoot...what we've been through? It would take a lot more than that to offend me! Our scenarios seem to be very similar...vasospasms and complications. When you tell other people, they don't understand or you feel like you're complaining. It's nice to say things to someone who doesn't judge and has empathy. When I say what I've been through, I have to admit, I'm bragging, a little bit. We almost DIED! On Valentine's Day 2014...the doc told my family that if they believe in prayer....now was the time to do it. I'm bragging because I'm like....check that out!! I was that bad and look at me now. To look at me you would be amazed that I had a SAH 20 months ago. But here I am! I also have Crohn's Disease and they sell T-shirts that say..."Well, you look fine to me". Maybe we could put that on the front and then our medical "issues" on the back. We need that for this, too!! It's frustrating that people can say you look good so therefore you must BE good.
I cannot imagine having the issues you've had with your eyes. How scary, too. I mean, we don't always feel well so reading and watching movies or shows is how we tend to spend at least some of our day. I'm ashamed to say how much time I spend in front of the TV and computer. I was a voracious reader prior to the SAH. Now...not so much. I can't retain and it can be too taxing on my brain. Can you see with a detached retina? Or..are you blind in one eye? I hope not!
You're right about caretakers...some are good some are not. My son was 18 and at home, so he helped immensely. After 6 weeks I became septic due to a UTI and was back in the neuro ICU. After a week I went into a nursing home, but...it was a nursing home I volunteer at, so it wasn't all that bad. In fact...I got to know more of the residents and the residents I already knew...I got to know better. Cannot believe he charged you to take care of you!! It's not dirty laundry if it is true and if you know I would never repeat it. So, no worries.
I hope the Zoloft makes a difference for you. Let me know...we'll try to keep in touch through the boards! Take care Alice. I'm sending good mojo your way..right now!
Alice said:
First of all, let me apologize Pixiechick, for the, Get to the Doc, command. It was insensitive of me, and I know better, especially since I am so much like you, as regards making decisions, completing tasks, etc. It's 12 noon, and I'm still in my nightgown.
My SAH was 4 years ago. I had major vasospasm issues. Half of my skull was removed to allow my brain to swell. As my Neurosurgeon said,"Whatever could go wrong, did go wrong." There was so much bleeding my retina's filled up with blood and I became blind. Eventually they performed vitrectomy on both eyes to restore my vision. My left retina was torn and eventually detached. Even now this eye never closes completely and so is often very dry requiring eyedrops continually and an eye patch at night. Eventually, I needed cataract surgery. I have a shunt in my left temple with a tube that runs into my abdomen.
My ex tried to keep me over-medicated and over dependent. He charged me $2000 per month to take care of me! I weaned myself off of the high doses of Trazodone and Clonazepam and told him I wasn't his profit center.
Not everyone has wonderful caretakers. Anyway that's enough dirty laundry. Thanks for the info on Zoloft. I had no idea that Lexapro and Cymbalta were in the same class. You'd think my psychiatrist would know this instead of forcing me to tough it out.
pixiechick66 said:
Alice....I have always been a bit of a procrastinator, but more so after the SAH. I experience the inability to make decisions quite a bit. I can make a decision, it just takes me a little bit of time. I've been trying to be more aware, and I find I am MUCH better at completing tasks and "using my brain" after I've been awake for a couple of hours, then...in the afternoon, late afternoon, I find my brain has had about all it can take for the day...dependent on how much I've had to use my brain. (people who have never been through what we've experienced would probably get a good laugh at what we post....like I can only use my brain for important things just a few hours each day!!) What a relief to be able to "talk" to people who know exactly what you've been through!I am still taking an anti-depressant...Zoloft. I take 150 mg. a day....100 mg. in the morning and 50 mg at bedtime. I'd been on the Lexapro for some time, so I believe (as well as my doc) that it had run it's course of effectiveness for me. I really like Zoloft. It has made a big difference for me. My primary doctor prescribed Cymbalta and I felt nothing after a month. I see a therapist (at times) and she referred me to a psychiatrist who prescribed the Zoloft. She explained to me that Lexapro and Cymbalta are in the same "class"...so if Lexapro had run it's course, then the Cymbalta would likely not work/make any impact. I felt a difference within weeks of being on Zoloft.
How long ago was your SAH? I was on anti-seizure for, maybe, 6-8 weeks after the bleed. (I had a lot of issues with vasospasms while in the neuro ICU.) I didn't drive then and had to wait another month after being off of them before I could drive. Now...I have no restrictions on driving. I'm sorry that lighting is an issue for you! You're absolutely right....where can you go these days that doesn't have fluorescent lighting?? Virtually almost EVERY place uses them. That has got to be very frustrating.
If you're still experiencing any depression...ask about a drug in a different "family". We go through so much after this life altering experience...you should not have to deal with depression also. And...a full dose may make a big difference for you. I hope you keep healing and keep on keeping on. It's what we do. How nice to be with (sort of) people who know your own struggles. And...I AM going to get to the doc!!
Alice said:Hi pixiechick! Have you always been a procrastinator, or have you become one since the SAH? I find I'm not as good at making decisions as I was before the "event." I never thought to call it procrastination, but it is a sort of delay, rather than an inability. And, since I don't like to be anywhere where there is flourescent lighting, (which is everywhere) I have to gather up all my internal strength, to do simple things like food shopping or taking the dog to the vet. Do you take anti depressants anymore? I was not on any seizure meds until I began the anti depressants. Do you drive? Here's the catch. I don't want to have a seizure while I'm driving, but I'm actually not on a full dose of anti depressant either. It's frustrating. GET TO YOUR DOC!!!!!
pixiechick66 said,Hi Alice! I was already taking Lexapro at the time of my SAH....I found I needed something else after about 3-4 months. I won't say I'm sorry you had to get a divorce, because I too divorced a "loser" (and I really hate that word but sometimes it fits!). I am happy that you are free of that negativity, though. This is a major life changing event, and if you don't have someone in your corner...it's that much more difficult. I no longer take anti-seizure meds, but.....I am, just within the past couple of months, experiencing A LOT of dizziness. I'm going to make an appointment with my neuro doc, but I find it very frustrating. I am using my cane at times, which I really don't like. I'll try to keep you posted after I see my doc...but I should warn you...I am THE master procrastinator!! I hope you receive some feedback from the site....post it as it's own question...you'll find that at least some people will be experiencing the same symptoms you are. Best of luck, Alice. Take care!!
Alice said:I went through major depression too. At first took Lexapro. As depression worsened was put on Cymbalta. In retrospect it had a lot to do with the fact that I was with a person who I divorced as soon as I was able. The antidepressant has lowered my seizure tolerance, so now I take anti-seizure meds too. The combination makes me dizzy at times. Do you or anyone have these problems?
Pixiechick66- I can see with my left eye. To repair a detached retina they perform a gruesome but effective operation. Somehow they cut around the white circumference of the eye, then bind it with what is called a sclera buckle...like a rubber band around the sclera...all I can say is OUCH!!!! Over time this "buckle" relaxes but I still feel some pain from time to time. I've also had the left tear duct plugged to help with the dryness. Suffice to say it's born the brunt of the bleed. I don't read like I used to either, for the same reasons. Let me ask you this...do your ears clog? Or do they ever get clogged? Mine do. It's positional. When I'm laying down, they're fine, but once I'm up for a while, it gets difficult to hear well, sort of echoey (Is that a word?) My sisters can always tell if my ears are clogged when they speak to me, because they say my voice changes. And finally, thanks again for the info about Zoloft. I have an appt Nov 18, when I intend to discuss the change from Cymbalta. You know, it took me 3+ years to muster up the nerve to join this group and I'm so glad I did.
pixiechick66 said:
Alice....don't you worry even a little tiny bit regarding the doc comment! Shoot...what we've been through? It would take a lot more than that to offend me! Our scenarios seem to be very similar...vasospasms and complications. When you tell other people, they don't understand or you feel like you're complaining. It's nice to say things to someone who doesn't judge and has empathy. When I say what I've been through, I have to admit, I'm bragging, a little bit. We almost DIED! On Valentine's Day 2014...the doc told my family that if they believe in prayer....now was the time to do it. I'm bragging because I'm like....check that out!! I was that bad and look at me now. To look at me you would be amazed that I had a SAH 20 months ago. But here I am! I also have Crohn's Disease and they sell T-shirts that say..."Well, you look fine to me". Maybe we could put that on the front and then our medical "issues" on the back. We need that for this, too!! It's frustrating that people can say you look good so therefore you must BE good.
I cannot imagine having the issues you've had with your eyes. How scary, too. I mean, we don't always feel well so reading and watching movies or shows is how we tend to spend at least some of our day. I'm ashamed to say how much time I spend in front of the TV and computer. I was a voracious reader prior to the SAH. Now...not so much. I can't retain and it can be too taxing on my brain. Can you see with a detached retina? Or..are you blind in one eye? I hope not!
You're right about caretakers...some are good some are not. My son was 18 and at home, so he helped immensely. After 6 weeks I became septic due to a UTI and was back in the neuro ICU. After a week I went into a nursing home, but...it was a nursing home I volunteer at, so it wasn't all that bad. In fact...I got to know more of the residents and the residents I already knew...I got to know better. Cannot believe he charged you to take care of you!! It's not dirty laundry if it is true and if you know I would never repeat it. So, no worries.
I hope the Zoloft makes a difference for you. Let me know...we'll try to keep in touch through the boards! Take care Alice. I'm sending good mojo your way..right now!
Alice said:
First of all, let me apologize Pixiechick, for the, Get to the Doc, command. It was insensitive of me, and I know better, especially since I am so much like you, as regards making decisions, completing tasks, etc. It's 12 noon, and I'm still in my nightgown.
My SAH was 4 years ago. I had major vasospasm issues. Half of my skull was removed to allow my brain to swell. As my Neurosurgeon said,"Whatever could go wrong, did go wrong." There was so much bleeding my retina's filled up with blood and I became blind. Eventually they performed vitrectomy on both eyes to restore my vision. My left retina was torn and eventually detached. Even now this eye never closes completely and so is often very dry requiring eyedrops continually and an eye patch at night. Eventually, I needed cataract surgery. I have a shunt in my left temple with a tube that runs into my abdomen.
My ex tried to keep me over-medicated and over dependent. He charged me $2000 per month to take care of me! I weaned myself off of the high doses of Trazodone and Clonazepam and told him I wasn't his profit center.
Not everyone has wonderful caretakers. Anyway that's enough dirty laundry. Thanks for the info on Zoloft. I had no idea that Lexapro and Cymbalta were in the same class. You'd think my psychiatrist would know this instead of forcing me to tough it out.
pixiechick66 said:
Alice....I have always been a bit of a procrastinator, but more so after the SAH. I experience the inability to make decisions quite a bit. I can make a decision, it just takes me a little bit of time. I've been trying to be more aware, and I find I am MUCH better at completing tasks and "using my brain" after I've been awake for a couple of hours, then...in the afternoon, late afternoon, I find my brain has had about all it can take for the day...dependent on how much I've had to use my brain. (people who have never been through what we've experienced would probably get a good laugh at what we post....like I can only use my brain for important things just a few hours each day!!) What a relief to be able to "talk" to people who know exactly what you've been through!I am still taking an anti-depressant...Zoloft. I take 150 mg. a day....100 mg. in the morning and 50 mg at bedtime. I'd been on the Lexapro for some time, so I believe (as well as my doc) that it had run it's course of effectiveness for me. I really like Zoloft. It has made a big difference for me. My primary doctor prescribed Cymbalta and I felt nothing after a month. I see a therapist (at times) and she referred me to a psychiatrist who prescribed the Zoloft. She explained to me that Lexapro and Cymbalta are in the same "class"...so if Lexapro had run it's course, then the Cymbalta would likely not work/make any impact. I felt a difference within weeks of being on Zoloft.
How long ago was your SAH? I was on anti-seizure for, maybe, 6-8 weeks after the bleed. (I had a lot of issues with vasospasms while in the neuro ICU.) I didn't drive then and had to wait another month after being off of them before I could drive. Now...I have no restrictions on driving. I'm sorry that lighting is an issue for you! You're absolutely right....where can you go these days that doesn't have fluorescent lighting?? Virtually almost EVERY place uses them. That has got to be very frustrating.
If you're still experiencing any depression...ask about a drug in a different "family". We go through so much after this life altering experience...you should not have to deal with depression also. And...a full dose may make a big difference for you. I hope you keep healing and keep on keeping on. It's what we do. How nice to be with (sort of) people who know your own struggles. And...I AM going to get to the doc!!
Alice said:Hi pixiechick! Have you always been a procrastinator, or have you become one since the SAH? I find I'm not as good at making decisions as I was before the "event." I never thought to call it procrastination, but it is a sort of delay, rather than an inability. And, since I don't like to be anywhere where there is flourescent lighting, (which is everywhere) I have to gather up all my internal strength, to do simple things like food shopping or taking the dog to the vet. Do you take anti depressants anymore? I was not on any seizure meds until I began the anti depressants. Do you drive? Here's the catch. I don't want to have a seizure while I'm driving, but I'm actually not on a full dose of anti depressant either. It's frustrating. GET TO YOUR DOC!!!!!
pixiechick66 said,Hi Alice! I was already taking Lexapro at the time of my SAH....I found I needed something else after about 3-4 months. I won't say I'm sorry you had to get a divorce, because I too divorced a "loser" (and I really hate that word but sometimes it fits!). I am happy that you are free of that negativity, though. This is a major life changing event, and if you don't have someone in your corner...it's that much more difficult. I no longer take anti-seizure meds, but.....I am, just within the past couple of months, experiencing A LOT of dizziness. I'm going to make an appointment with my neuro doc, but I find it very frustrating. I am using my cane at times, which I really don't like. I'll try to keep you posted after I see my doc...but I should warn you...I am THE master procrastinator!! I hope you receive some feedback from the site....post it as it's own question...you'll find that at least some people will be experiencing the same symptoms you are. Best of luck, Alice. Take care!!
Alice said:I went through major depression too. At first took Lexapro. As depression worsened was put on Cymbalta. In retrospect it had a lot to do with the fact that I was with a person who I divorced as soon as I was able. The antidepressant has lowered my seizure tolerance, so now I take anti-seizure meds too. The combination makes me dizzy at times. Do you or anyone have these problems?