I’m new here and have learned so much from reading the site I would love some advice.
I had a ruptured aneruysm just over 4 months ago. I was fortunate to be able to have it coiled but they were unable to coil the whole aneurysm so suffice it to say one remains. Apparently coiling the whole thing could have caused some serious issues so now i am being watched by my doctor to see if any issues arise. I spent 2 weeks in the hospital and the rest of the time working towards getting better. I have returned to work part time, and i am hoping that I will soon be allowed to return full time. I recognize how incredibly lucky i am and appreciate those around me immensely.
Here are some of my issues…
Although I don’t believe it to be maliciously, i see the pitiful looks people give me or feel like they are checking to see what my deficits are. I am incredibly fortunate to not really have any, but it bothers me so much to see the pity or feel like people are checking me or my actions out. I think this is more a me problem but i really struggle to get over it.
I really want my life back. I want to return to work fulltime…it’s a position i enjoy and have worked hard for. I have learned a lot these last few months. I have cut out as much stress as I can, eating healthier, no alcohol, exercise (moderately) more but i feel like my doctor will take a long time before I can return fulltime. Am I missing something? Am i not taking this seriously enough? (I feel I am, but his hesitancy makes me wonder.)
It was a really frightening time for myself and my family. I had tremendous support from family and friends. I am so thankful to be here and know how lucky I am. But i sway from just wanting my life back, for people to treat me nornally and go about life with my new normal but I wonder if I am doing it wrong. Am I letting my pride or stubbornness lead my way and I am sicker then I feel? I just don’t know what to do. At the end of the day what matters most is staying alive for my family. How do you decide what is right and when to stop pushing? I will be the first to admit putting my life in someone’s hands is hard for me and i feel like the decisions i want to make aren’t available to me. I would at least like to try!
Can you tell me how you cope? What i might be missing?
Sorry for the novel and thank you in advance for any advice!