My husband is 8 months out from his SAH rupture and is not making much progress. He’s been through many months of intensive therapies (sp, ot, and physical). He suffered multiple strokes and too many vasospasms to count right after the rupture. Now we’ve been dealing with seizures that come everyday despite multiple meds. He’s hooked up to a 24 hour EEG machine that gets turned in today and wouldn’t you know it, he only had 1 yesterday that I noticed. Anyway, he’s extremely depressed and not motivated. He was clinically depressed before his SAH rupture and it’s really compounded. It’s hard for me to stay positive when I too am getting worn down from being his primary care giver. Anyone else experiencing lack of progress this far out from rupture/treatment? Thanks!
I am sorry you are struggling so much. I am grateful my husband has not experienced these struggles at this extent, but one thing that stands out is the motivation. He was never a highly motivated person, however, for 10 years worked long hours at the factory down the road to help support us. Now he is home. Home with the kids, one of which is in school full time. Home doing few chores and napping 2 hours a day which makes long hours at a job impossible. Grateful for social security disability and I work, but it can get frustrating a lot. Sometimes I feel if he could just set his mind to doing better for himself, he could, but he chooses not to and doesn't know where to begin. I try to leave him honey-do lists to take some weight off my shoulders since he is home, but I feel often more like his mother than his wife. For better or worse, sickness and health . It was a vow. A promise. Not easy, but one day at a time. I hope things get better for you and him. Push the doctors for testing or anything else that you may think will help. Don't give up!
Melissa,
8 months is a very short amount of time for brain injuries. I'm 5 years almost and still working hard to help my wife. Get some help so you can take care of yourself, as this whole thing is a marathon. Take care of yourself
Caregiving has wore me down this year. What makes it worse is that I work in mental health (for over 20 years). I feel as if I’m not appreciated enough, by husband or his children from a previous message. I’m keeping a roof over our head and taking care of him. I’m worried someday something will happen to me and no one will be here to care for him. It’s very frustrating.
Michelle said:
I am sorry you are struggling so much. I am grateful my husband has not experienced these struggles at this extent, but one thing that stands out is the motivation. He was never a highly motivated person, however, for 10 years worked long hours at the factory down the road to help support us. Now he is home. Home with the kids, one of which is in school full time. Home doing few chores and napping 2 hours a day which makes long hours at a job impossible. Grateful for social security disability and I work, but it can get frustrating a lot. Sometimes I feel if he could just set his mind to doing better for himself, he could, but he chooses not to and doesn't know where to begin. I try to leave him honey-do lists to take some weight off my shoulders since he is home, but I feel often more like his mother than his wife. For better or worse, sickness and health . It was a vow. A promise. Not easy, but one day at a time. I hope things get better for you and him. Push the doctors for testing or anything else that you may think will help. Don't give up!
My husband, more than 2 years past rupture, is safe at home alone, but I feel the same regarding the wife/mother comment. I had envisioned an active and enjoyable retirement for him, but his days are filled with watching TV, routine chores, and napping. He sees a neuropsychologist and contends that he is happy. I think there is an inability to self-motivate and plan. I am learning to accept that what he says about being happy is his to define.