Today hubby started talking after 5 months stage 4 bleed. His speech though weak is uclear and cons
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Hi Palhuc, âword findingâ is a common problem after brain injury. The speech therapists are very good at helping this. If you give him time to find the word, or just help him with a clue (it starts with '.m ') instead of giving him the word, you help his brain to reforge the connections and he will remember better in the long run. I played little word games with my husband, eg. name three fruits, name the provinces (we are Canadian ) from west to east, what are your hobbies, tell me your sisters names and the cities they live in, etc. Easy stuff, in long term memory. It will improve, but you are important here. He will want to get better to be the man he was for YOU. Keep up your good work.
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Very exciting! He is making progress! He is coming back! As Judy pointed out, you can be very helpful to him at this stage.
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Wow, BIG step. Hugs and thinking of you! Hang in there.
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Itâs really impossible to diagnose from a distance, but smiling at appropriate times is probably a sign of recovery.
Iâm not sure what you mean about his feet coming back; does he have feeling in them? That would be a good sign, even if he is not yet putting weight on them.
You will handle his needs to the best of your ability, and that may sometimes require outside help. If you meant what you said, then you are not lying to him. You will do your best.
Hi Palhuc. I learned there is something called, I think, masking. Brain injured people may feel emotions intensely but not show it on their faces. You can not necessarily tell his feelings by his face. Itâs a thing. Also fear/anxiety is common after brain injury. My husband tells me he is scared all the time. As soon as my husband began to verbalize negative thoughts and emotions, he was given an antidepressant. It has been a good thing.
yes my sister said i gave her huge smile after 6 day coma! thanks for reminding me! I almost forgot. Hopefully you will get a smile soon, just remember it takes time as the brain is scrambling to reconnect pathways etc etc. My humor was off for months! Hang in there, things will get better! Prayers for excellerated healing! tc
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Itâs good to hear of your interaction with him. My wife lost virtually all abilities because of the combination of ruptured aneurysm and time on her back; having not been in that situation before, I was surprised she could not even sit up. But once she was cleared to start doing that, the old abilities came back little by little over time. Some came back quickly, and others took longer. Everyone comes back at their own pace. We were counseled to take it as it comes and not have expectations as to how it should be. You are doing well to be so involved with him. You can affect him like no unknown nurse ever could (weâre still thankful for those nurses!).
You are right, it is hurtful and confusing. Sometimes people do not know what to say and inadvertently put their foot in their mouth. We have all done it. Sometimes people talk and tell you more about themselves and their agenda than they realize. I came to operate on the principle that I assume evryone is doing their best, even if sometimes that is not very good.
She could hardly sit up when she was transported to an acute rehab facility. The hospital where her surgery was done expected her to be there three to five months. After she got there they had her walking with a walker in three weeks. They were amazed at the speed of her recovery considering her extensive bleed and resulting damage. But everyone recovers at their own rate. We have a friend who had a similar injury the same year as my wifeâs, and her recovery has not been good, even though she has had good care. She can do almost nothing and needs full-time care. But her husband loves her, and she recognizes that. I will pray for your husband to walk. Keep on hoping.
Thatâs a good attitude, Judy, and it produces the best relationships. Maybe others are doing their best. Even if they are not, it helps oneself to not become bitter. I know when my wife was going through this situation I was very sensitive. So itâs good not to assume I can read othersâ motivesâreally I canât anyway. Assuming the best is healthy.
There is much that is unknown and unpredictable about recovery. I think itâs best not to second-guess but just accept what is. Our medical personnel informed us well but were frank. I appreciate that. They gave us a range: she could get up and walk out in two weeks, or she might eventually wake up and not know anyone and not do anything, or anything in between. How one person recovers is not a standard for how another recovers. Your doctor is probably just trying not to mislead youâheâs not going to promise you something he cannot deliver. Ours told us something like this: We have fixed the problem, but we can guarantee nothing regarding recovery. Obviously weâd love to be more hopeful, but this is the reality.
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Hi Palhuc, please post as you need to. Do whatever helps you through this. It is agonizing to watch a sick and suffering loved one, and brain injury is especially hard because no one can give you a prognosis. Is the hospital treating his bedsore agressively now? He is a young (relatively) man and that is in his favour for wound healing. This healing journey that we are all on, is a long and winding road. But the brain can learn as long as it is alive.
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That wound could be holding him back. Unfortunately, one cannot walk that backâwhatâs done is done. Itâs a complication, but it also can be overcome. Again, unfortunately what must be overcome is more than just the original injury. Donât dwell on thatâjust keep on encouraging him to overcome whatever he needs to overcome.
What you are going through is very difficult, Pat, and although this road to recovery is unique to you and to your Dennis, there are people here who understand what it is like to be where you are now. Aside from the caregivers at the hospital (who have to maintain a certain detachment in order to be able to do the difficult work that they do), none of us have very many people in our home environment who can truly âget itâ. That is exactly what this forum is for, and supporting others is why people are here.
There are some really great people on this forum who have been kind enough to lend an ear, I promise I will ease off.
No need to apologize, nor to promise to âease offâ. We are here for you. Please remember this as well: many of the great, supportive people youâve met here find meaning and purpose in being able to help others who are in difficulty. At its best, peer support makes everyone involved stronger and more resilient. And thatâs what Benâs Friends is all about.
Seenie
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Hi Palhuc,
Please to meet you. I am a survivor of ruptured aneurysm. It will be 3 years in the end of April. First, your husband is lucky to have you as a caregiver. It is really helpful in the recovery having a dedicated care giver. In my experience, I was in the ICU for 3 weeks. I had a level 4 Fischer SAH as I bleed in subarachnoid space between the cerebellum and brain stem and into the ventricles. I did have a stroke in the brain stem that effected my balance, vision and hearing. But, I am alive and independent today and working through my disabilities. I remember that I could barely walk. The NeuroSurgeon explained that being bed ridden completely affects walking.
In my survivor group, there was a couple (Mom and Son). The Mom had a ruptured aneurysm and was in a coma. In the first year, it sounds similar to your husbandâs case. But, 10 years later, she is now independent.
I recommend the following: 1) get detailed Neuro-Surgeon notes. It will explain the location of the aneurysm, the area of SAH, and any evidence of stroke, 2) after the initial days, there will be an order for physical therapy, neuro-PT, and cognitive/emotional evaluation depending on his condition. Keep a journal as it will be helpful in his recovery, 3) finding a support group. If there is no aneurysm support group in your area, then join a stroke support group. You will find people will similar issues. It is very helpful both from caregiver and survivor point of view.
The good news is he is talking which shows the first sign that he is recovery. Emotional and cognitive issues are common with brain injury (strokes, TBI) It takes time for the brain to heal.
Also, give yourself a break too. Recovery is a marathon not a sprint. There are hills as well as valley. But, there is hope and light in the end of tunnel. You just need patience and resilience.
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Hi Palhuc,
It is difficult for me to comment on your husbandâs hospital care other than you have my sympathies. Aneurysms is still regarded as rare condition. A lot of hospitals do not get a lot aneurysm cases so they do not have experience. There are âHospital of Excellenceâ where the staff is geared in treating aneurysm cases like UCSF, BNI/St Joseph Hospital, NYU, Toronto where they treat thousands of cases. Based on your profile, you live in Canada. Is there someone in your hospital network who knows the experts in Toronto? There may be a medical professional who can help in both short term and long term recovery. Also, ask around in cases of long hospitals stays like TBI (i.e car accident with major head trauma). I am sure that there are cases treated in your husbandâs hospital.
I am not a medical professional but I would do the following:
- Speak with the physical therapist on his walking and movement strategy. It took me around 2 months to fully recover physically where I can walk at full strength.
- Neuro-PT. Depending on location of bleed, speech is a common problem which I did not have. However, I developed balance/dizzy issues which I am still dealing with. Ask the hospital on the best Neuro-PT specialist. You will know whether there are neurological deficits as he becomes more active.
- Cognitive/Emotional. In TBI and stroke cases, cognitive and emotional issues are common. PTSD is actually a pathway issue affecting emotional states. Ask whether there is a neuro-psychologist on staff.
In the meanwhile, you are the best person to help your husband in his recovery. Bring favorite photos, play his favorite music. Depression is probably normal as he is becoming aware of his circumstances. But, BEING POSITIVE by your example is really important in his recovery. I hope that best for him.
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Excellent advice!
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Palhuc,
I know that you are disappointed with your husbandâs current care; however, he should still be under the care of his Neuro-Surgeon and Neurologist. As he is going through PT, Neuro-PT, and cognitive/emotional evaluation, the Neuro-Surgeon should be consulted with on medication and progress of recovery. I know that it is not an easy time but stay focused and positive.
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My wife didnât say what your husband did, but she did say lots of funny things. Sadly, some people do separate after one has an injury like this. We have a friend in another state who suffered an aneurysm the same year as my wife; her husband was told by the medical people that he could place her into a nursing home and get on with his life. He didnât want to hear another word from those people. He is sticking with her and even took her on a trip last year, though she needs lots of help. You may hear other surprises yet from your husband. Thatâs ok.