Its been a while since I've been on this site and I can really use some advice. two and a half years ago I suffered Craniotomy with clipping. My first thing is, I just went back to work three weeks ago and I've noticed that I cannot work for three days in a row. Im getting the worse tension headaches ever. Has anyone had a similar experience to this? What should I do?
Since my operation I feel that I've gotten stronger in a lot of areas. What I dont understand is that some of the things I struggled with continue to come back. Mainly my anger. I would get angry at the smallest things, but I wouldn't remember why. I have five children but we are left with our youngest who just turned 15 at home. Its been a real tough roller coster for her and my wife. It seems like I'm always angry, cranky, or snapping at them when I really don't mean to. The one thing I'm noticing is that I can actually see it now. I can see at that moment what I got angry about, and I'm wondering if this is a good sign. Has anyone experienced something similar to this? Thank you in advance.
Joseph...I have been doing a lot of research on our brain areas/capacities... I have no expertise...I am non-degreed/non-licensed...and, a survivor of coils/stents...
Overtime, I did regain "reading/comprehension"...and, am yet so behind on everything in life...I do not have the privilege of anger...I have not cried since my first f/u angio/procedure ...7 months and 21 days post coiling/stenting..
Generally (most commonly), our aneurysms are located in the arteries at the central base level of our brain... Common names for that area are: limbic system a/k/a the medial temporal lobe and/or the term "emotion brain"...
In that limbic area exists a lot of other pieces/parts... the "emotion" portion is the amygdala...which you may want to research online....to develop your questions to ask you neuro-docs...
I think (as I type here)...I also put the "limbic system"...in the Resource Category towards the end of the list of our "categories" than here now... If I had sensibility, I'd have viewed it before responding here!
Because I do not know you/your background...if your neuro-doc had referred you to a neurologist, therapists, and/or provided you explanations.
Then, as for your current work...consider talking with your boss...whoever/where ever..
Again, as I have stated above...I have no expertise...those neuro-docs likely and presumably do... for explaining the 'neuro' system of our brain/body...
Wishing you the best and for updates from you on what may be beneficial, helpful to you...
I had/ have a problem with frustration, usually its frustration around what I could do and now what I can do. Physically, I'm better, not great, but I was worse. So that's an improvement, but I seem to have a lesser ability to do tasks that were like second nature. At first I took my 'frustration' out on the hospital staff, then my wife. Neither was a good idea. I don't get physical about it but I can be like a bear with a sore head. Say one wrong thing and I'd fly off the handle The littlest things can set me off, I do not know why. At first I thought it maybe diet or medication related but I've altered things there, with little to no improvement. The dr's have been very quick to hand out the psych meds and this annoys me as its not an option I want to explore at this point.
For those of us who have had intracranial surgery, lets face it, its a major, major operation. What's inside that box (your skull) is all the circuitry makes EVERYTHING work together. I've had a few operations now and with each one I've had a different set of symptoms and right from the very first surgery I have never gotten back to my previous "normal", each one has lowered my abilities and tolerances. After the first surgery I pushed myself to get back to work and I did, but at very reduced hours. Slowly (And I mean very slowly) eventually I recovered enough and did return full time. But since my last episode I can't even maintain a decent home routine let alone a workload. I try to vary my days with things I can do, but if I drive into town I need a co driver because if I get a headache in town, I'm stuck. I'm not safe to drive, not safe for me, my passengers or anybody else on the roads. And driving for me used to be my 'mellow time' not anymore. There is too much happening and I can't process it all. If I stay home and just clean I seem to over do it and pay in pain. It seems such a fineline between enough and too much and this annoys the living daylights outta me. I try to plan things, but it never works... ...pain dominates. So my angst builds cos I could and now I can't, my angst builds due to the awful pain, my angst builds cos I have to rely on others.
I ( and everybody around me) need 'me time' wind down, in my own company, where I can not fly off at others. Yes Im annoyed, yes I'm frustrated, but its not with others. In reality its with myself and focusing it on others around me ain't good for anybody. In times of clarity I have no problem with this theory at all but in times where things aren't that clear " don't cross my path, cos I'm about ready to kill" when I know I'm getting to that point. I need time. I used to draw, in pencil, so I 'try' to switch off into that now. I'm not as good as I was at drawing anymore but it takes me out of my own headspace, which is often what's needed. Just that break.
So that's what I do or try to do. I say 'try' as I'm not always successful but I try. Maybe you need to look at how you can switch off.
Joseph, Do you think the tension headaches are due to the new stressors of returning to work? See if you can do some relaxation breathing through them or try massage. My psychologist suggested that anger is a normal part of having brain issues be it TBI or SAH or even surgery. I think it’s a great move that you can identify the anger building. In my opinion it is much easier to deal with the known. From working with kids for 20 years, and their families, I know this - anger depletes the oxygen levels. If you make a fist and do deep breathing correctly, you cannot keep your hand from relaxing. So watch out for the cues your body gives, tightened jaws, gritting teeth, stomach tightens… When you feel that first thing that tells you your getting angry, breathe and breathe deep and slow.
Also I took the liberty and did a search on Psychology Today for therapists with backgrounds in TBI (they don’t list SAH) and CBT. Maybe one would be good for you to check in with. I’d ask if they have any experience with SAH. And remember a good therapist is like a good pair of shoes, it’s all about fit and comfort. Do they help accomplish your skills. I always go in with a goal in mind. It’s up to me to determine the path of my recovery. Good luck and let us know what’s working for you!