ANEURYSM: A poem by Shannon Jones-Fry

General personal-stories
1

This Poem puts every single emotion we feel thru the Healing Journey of an Aneurysm/AVM into such eloquent words. While I did get Shannon's permission to share here in this forum; she asks that if you share this in any other forum that you respectfully maintain the title and credit to the Author.

Enjoy the read!

ANEURYSM: A poem by Shannon Jones-Fry

How can I explain to those

who can never understand

The person that I was is gone

This is who I am.

The core inside of me remains

Loving, good and kind

But the easygoing rest of me

Has been left behind.

They say patience is a virtue

I use to have this trait

It shines through on occasion

But the new Me hates to wait.

Anger was slow to rise

In the person I use to be

Anger boils and rages

Inside of this new Me.

Previously quick to answer

Any questions one put forth

So slow with answers now

I fear I'm losing my self worth.

The memory of an elephant

Use to be inside my mind

This new me forgets everything

And is always running behind.

My mind was always clear

Solving problems without a fault

This other self took over

And my brain seems an empty vault.

No one can see the confusion

Behind the same face that they adore

But until there's wreckage in their brain

They only understand the Me before.

2

This is great and I’m so glad you shared with us. I have to assume Shannon speaks from experience. I can identify with a lot of it (unfortunately!) but strangely enough it made me feel good reading it. Maybe because it says it all so well without the rambling I’m so prone to and I see hopefulness for the future in the words. Yeah I know that sounds weird but it’s what I took from it. Thanks again.

3

Hi Wendy and, Yes, Shannon does speak from experience, she is a Aneurysm survivor. And I can relate to You feeling good while reading this....I did too as I experienced each and every one of these emotions thru my healing journey! But will gratefully tell you that I don't feel all of these now; 4 years in :-)! And your sharing does not sound weird at all .... Hopeful we all should remain when dealing with these beasts!!! And it's all my pleasure to share something that strikes a cord in my heart so you are most welcome!

4

This really hits home, how I feel most days & get upset that I am not the same person I once was. So many things I once was able to do that I can no longer do & my memory seems like it is declining some days, it is scary! Wonderful poem!

5

Perfect!

6

Yes, this is very true. I have peole tell me all of the time you look great and it is hard to beleive you had an aneursym. Inside I know I am not the same. I think most people think I am being lazy not wanting to do to much and need to rest. Before the aneursym I was non-stop and always busy, busy. I feel guilty at times because I do look good on the outside but on the inside I move slower and my quick wit has slowed. I just feel so vey blessed to be a live and able to care for myself and no long term disabilities from the surgery. Just a few minor inconveninces in my thought process and a few headaches and some tiredness.

7

Only a survivor could write about this, or understand the poem. Excellent work. Wish she would write one about speech. That is one issue I still deal with.

8

Hi Betty! Guilt no more! And it just doesn't matter what most people think; All that matters is what YOU think and How you feel! ... but I can relate to this as through my recovery I felt the same way ... but I've smartened up thru it :-)! Sounds like You are doing the Best you can so just keep this up -- and Blessed YOU are for sure!!!

Betty Knebel said:

Yes, this is very true. I have peole tell me all of the time you look great and it is hard to beleive you had an aneursym. Inside I know I am not the same. I think most people think I am being lazy not wanting to do to much and need to rest. Before the aneursym I was non-stop and always busy, busy. I feel guilty at times because I do look good on the outside but on the inside I move slower and my quick wit has slowed. I just feel so vey blessed to be a live and able to care for myself and no long term disabilities from the surgery. Just a few minor inconveninces in my thought process and a few headaches and some tiredness.

9

Thank you so much for posting this. OMG it is like lifting a weight off my shoulders . Everyday I try struggle to be like I use to be . And now I know it’s not just me . Thank you for understanding and making me feel it’s ok . I would love to share this with my children if it’s ok

10

I am so glad this helped to Lift those weights Debby and boy do they get HEAVY at times! And, YES, by all means, please do share this with your children!!! I know that many of us feel like we walk thru this healing journey on our own because it feels like no one truly understands ALL that we have gone thru....not even us for that matter. However, I also feel that we can not hold our Loved ones 100% responsible for "not understanding"...heck, we don't even understand this ourselves... And I feel it is our responsibility to share with them what we learn so that they can learn right along side with us :-). All that I ask is that whoever you may share this with you respectfully maintain the title and credit to the Author.

Hang in there girl!

Michele

xO

11

Thank you for posting this! It helped me understand what my relative is going through and all of you. God Bless ALL of you!!!

12

All my Pleasure to share Cassandra! I'm sure you are a wonderful Blessing to your relative who has had to persevere thru a terrifying health trial. May God Bless You richly as you continue to be such a Gift of Light & Love in your loved one's life! /Michele

Cassandra said:

Thank you for posting this! It helped me understand what my relative is going through and all of you. God Bless ALL of you!!!