@Dorothy1
I’ve read that book twice! I found it in the Dollar Tree Store! What an inspiring read!
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Hi Dairy! I had my rupture last year in feb 2020. I would say the best piece of advice I can give you as a caretaker is to be patient with your mom, even if she does something that may irritate you. Remind yourself that her brain is healing so during that time it will take to heal, her processing may be slower ( for everything: understanding, hearing, seeing and even emotionally) so be gentle with her feelings and give her extra time to process things, explain why if need be.
I also found it helpful to have a daily schedule that i wrote down that included my therapies that i set up for myself, like occupational therapy exercises for my affected hand, and speech therapy exercises for cognition. Make sure she is the one that sets up the schedule, it will help her regain a bit of control of her life and schedule. As an adult she may struggle with the fact everyone will tell her what to do, and that begins to get very frustrating. But be patient, and understand if she gets angry or agitated with you, it’s nothing personal. She may have a difficult time expressing herself. Or she may be over worked and tired and her response will come off as agitation. It’s something that with time and healing she will relearn to control. I hope that helps!
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Kellie!
I’m so happy you’re well! Thank you for your reply. It is very encouraging.
With love,
D
Blessed1
Thank you for validating and empathizing with me. It has been quite the experience, but i am forever blessed that my mom survived. Thank you for your story and your support. It means more than you know.
With love,
D
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Ninalexa,
I pray for your continual recovery. Thank you for giving me an insight into how my mom may feel from day today. You’re right. Patience is something I have to work on, as well as allow her to be involved in her own care. Thank you for the tips and tricks. I just want to bring her back into independence as swiftly and safely as possible. Thank you for your help.
Love,
D
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Hi Dairy. Of course, happy to help. One more thing in addition to you having patience, make sure you remind your mom to be patient with herself as well. Remind her of all her achievements up to this point and that it will get better with time. It’s a life changing event and it can bring about a lot of frustration for her when she finds things are a bit different or difficult, especially for someone that may have been very independent before. Feel free to reach out with any other questions! I hope this helps!
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Oh and one more thing I thought of, I lost my filter, so if you think of a child who simply says whatever they are thinking without regard to how it may be received or interpreted, yah that’s me. I believe this happens fairly often to people with brain injuries though so it may be something you will have to deal with. Try not to take it personal.
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OHH YEA, me too.
I wouldn’t say I had a good filter to begin with 
but now I actually have to stop myself from saying the first thing that comes to mind and take the time to think of my answers so as not to offend. My initial thoughts are often too direct, honest but direct. Some people take my pause to analyse my answer as a sign that I don’t know what to say and this only serves to add to my frustration. Then if someone pushes me to get a more timely response Ohhh they’ll get an answer alright (often containing an expletive (or 2)) and that’s sure to offend. If I’m questioned further I tend to explode and that’s never pretty. They say ‘Patience is a virtue’ but no one could ever accuse me of being a good patient 
Merl from the Modsupport Team
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@Kellie2 @ModSupport the filter! Oh my, wish I had one. Seven years later and I’m just slightly, very slightly better. We never know what’s going to come out, kind of makes life interesting
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This is Moltroub’s secret weapon: combined with a sense of humour, she brightens the day of a lot of BAFSupport members.
Thanks for everything you do, Moltroub!
Seenie
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