10 year anniversary

[Kdyd]

I just celebrated my 10th Anniversary of coiling of a ruptured annie. I have no memory of the first year, infections occurred after coiling, they moved me way too much. I did it without family, just a few friends. Improvement started when I was in a familiar home, with home help, and trusted medical and group support.

All was going well, I had healthy routines, then COVID galloped along, we lost loved ones, supports and became isolated. I watched my memory slip, felt energy and motivation fall, and watched new health problems pop up with no experts to help.

At the same time we saw new problems with medical and pharmacy resources. Crime and gunfire entered safe neighborhoods, life itself felt unsafe. Water was harming the brains of young ones, their learning rates was diving. We know domestic violence rates were rising. We’ve yet to see the full consequence of all this and more.

Across the globe a nation bombed civilians and school children continue to be killed in our nation like no other. We are watching civilization break down. Though some might say religion and politicians have the answers, too often abuse and trauma are caused by these.

It’s my 10th year of recovery, I’ve moved backward the last few years, if I suggest I am not sleeping and am depressed there is no experienced professional to trust not to make it worse. And so it goes until the history of this time is written with its solutions.

Most communities are focusing on helping the child and not aging populations. It makes sense, but still. I’ve worked too hard to give up. Many still call and ask me to volunteer, years ago I could do that, but I can’t now. When I say no, they just shrug and walk away.

My hope for the new year is that all this will turns, Covid becomes history, we close the book on inhumane wars, gun crimes and stressed medical and social systems.

I want the history volume on the shelf with its ending to these problems, written in bold. Only then will be on a path to a hopeful, healthy and less devisive future.

Blessings of health and peace!

I hoped vaccines were the answer, many fought over that, in my city even Clinic workers refused vaccines and home help agencies did not have policy as they sent workers into homes of immune suppressed clients.

[Moltroub]

Happy anniversary KD! I’ve read your post a couple of times, lots of food for thought. Life is interesting with all the ups and downs of a bar graph. Like you, I can’t do the things I did years ago. I don’t think of my rupture as limiting me, even though it does, but more an age factor.

We are in the same age group and your writing had me pondering on what my Grandma lived through being born in 1895, she saw a lot of change, and a lot of horrors, Spanish Influenza, World Wars, life and death of loved ones and those she never met. Her story and ours are quite similar don’t you think?

Unfortunately, some things never change, but some do, people still age and need help, domestic violence has never gone away it’s just a focus in the news now. Violence towards others has never really changed but the news stations like to focus on violence. Greed has never changed with the powers that be in my humble opinion.

However, we can change as individuals and for me, that’s what I focus on. How can I personally make someone else’s life a little easier, a little more blessed if you will. It’s like one of my favorite movies, “Pay it Forward”.

I rarely watch the news, though I don’t like to be ignorant, I also don’t want to be bombarded by negativity. I need to control it so I limit myself to one or two newscasts a week. I try to watch the opposing stations so I can better balance what is going on. One of the things I learned as a Social Worker was if someone is depressed they need to control what they watch and read, reduction in violence such as the news or movies can help with reducing depression.

I once was told by a very learned individual that I was living in a bubble as I tried very hard to make life fair for those I worked with. “Life is not fair, you’re beating a dead horse. You need to accept it” she insisted. My reply was, “I only need to start with one person”.

We affect the lives of others even without our knowledge. At work, we had a group of women, mostly our age group now, who could sew or crochet or knit. They would bring blankets to the agency for the children who came into custody. One of my coworkers worked with the adult population and asked the Program Manager if we could spare a few blankets, they were usually the size for babies but made great lap blankets. The PM asked the group of ladies if they minded, of course not! Not only did they not mind, we soon had a plethora of blankets large enough for adults to use if in a wheelchair or bedridden! Perhaps you have a skill set that you can do to not only help yourself but someone else as well. Maybe you can put an extra can of food in your cart at the grocery store and donate it to a local charity. There are many ways to help others even though we may have passed the age of physically helping.

I wish blessing upon you KD! May you find light in this new year.

[John]

All it takes is one good person to make a difference, to give an opportunity where there were none.