So it’s been a little over a month since my diagnosis. I was diagnosed 2 days before my 26th birthday (due to a concussion my puppy gave me…) and it’s been a little tumultuous.
I wasn’t able to meet with my new doctor until 3 weeks after it was found. I went through a pretty intense mourning period—crying nonstop, missing work because I couldn’t care, consistently thinking about what this meant now—but then I got some pretty good news. I have an intracranial, extradural brain aneurysm that is 3mm. They’ve put me on a monitoring plan and the risk of surgery is much higher than the risk of rupturing, so it’s not really an option right now. It’s also behind my left eye, right around my sinuses, so my eye will turn bright red if it ever does rupture.
I know that I got pretty good news that it’s extradural because it gives me more time to get to the hospital and lessens the chance of me… but it still feels like my life has been turned upside down.
I’m starting to freak out about it again, but it feels like I’m not allowed to anymore since more time has passed and I’m lucky enough to know ahead of time. A lot of people did the whole “oh, you need to be positive about this!” and it took everything not to just scream. Every time I get a headache around my left eye I get really scared. I just want to get to the point where this is something I live with and it’s “easier” to accept. I don’t know what to do or who to talk to; what are things you’ve all done to just live with it?