The closest I have come to understanding what you all have gone through

My first husband, who is my son's father, had some kind of episode in the shower, it may have been a stroke, it could have been a BA or an AVM that burst, I am not entirely sure, but he first went back and hit his head on a corner of a sharp bathroom counter corner, cracking open his skull, from there he fell in the hall, hitting his head on the oak floor, on the way to the phone, he went down, hit his head on the bed post.

I could not believe the blood in the house, and my son looked at me and said, "but mom, I have already cleaned most of it up"!

He managed to somehow get to the phone, dial 911 and go downstairs, where he fell again, yet another fracture and bleed out, but managed to open the door for the paramedics.

From the local ER he was airlifted to Johns Hopkins Shock Trauma unit and not expected to live through the flight, then not expected to live through the night, the week, but he did, he came off the vent eventually and was moved from one rehab facility to another, and finally my son put a beautiful apartment in his basement for him.

He still knows me, always knows me, but expects me to still be in my twenties, he still studies every history book he can get his hands on, thinks he is in grad school.

He still calls me 'honey' and my current husband is okay with that, they have become buddies. He is always invited here for holidays, and when I visit him, I always try to take him a book or a ream of paper and handful of ink pens for 'his studies'.

He is labeled as a TBI, and is a walking contradiction, as he should have never lived through it. It was a very long road for him.

I have just a little understanding of what you and your families have gone through and am here to support you.

Sending my best to all,


Susa, I had no idea. It is like you to have maintained the relationship and continued to care for him – you are such a kind person. It just goes to show that we all have misfortunes and hurdles to overcome, either ourselves or our loved ones. Some of us have more than others, to be sure. Accepting life’s curveballs and helping where we can is all we can do sometimes.

BTW, he has NO idea who our son is!

I will always love him.

Of course you will.

Susa, how difficult for you and the whole family. I had no idea either, and I thank you for sharing that with us. This is your thread, but I’d like to post on it because I, too, have an experience which the subject line describes. Do you mind if I add my own story?

Not long ago I came across something that I’m trying to keep in mind daily: Always remember that every person who you meet is fighting a battle that you know nothing about.

Yes, please post your story here, Seenie!