Survival remorse

Own it! Its Your Day! Celebrate.
Its sounds like its getting cliche but its helped me and maybe it will help whomever. But yes, You deserve to be here!


I’m late on this one. Sept 17th 2013 is my day. It’s the day that I became a new person, and I’m still trying to find my way around her. How and when will I be comfortable being this other me??? I can’t do my job that I was going before Annie made her debut. I’m still trying to find out what I can do without feeling like an idiot. Any suggestions. I don’t have a support system. I have asthma, and rheumatoid arthritis. Exercising is a must, but it can’t be done due to inflammation.

Misjay, sept 17th is “Your Day”, own it. You deserve to be here. And finding your way around a new “you” is not an easy task and i know where you’re coming from, but may i propose that you approach the new you as the survived you. Embrace the changes for better or worse, you wouldn’t know about them if we still didnt have you to listen and learn from. For me it was learning the new Eric, i found i likes him better that the old one. I have seizures, memory issues, but all in all, its Me, and im better for knowing the difference between the two.
So, Its Your Day, own it. You deserve to be here!

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For me, I had a pretty big change in life as well. It’s like @Eric_F suggests, embrace the new you. There are so many joyful, wondrous things in life if we only look and that includes looking at ourselves.

I have Dermatomyositis with a good bit of arthritis throughout my body and I’ll be danged if it beats me. Had that same response when I ruptured. When the pain is so intense exercising seems like it would be the straw that broke the camel’s back, I say I’m in control and do what I can anyways. 99.99% of the time, I feel better for it. It’s an odd thing that when we have inflammation, the last thing we want to do is exercise, but it’s the best thing for us.

We can help support you here, just start a new topic. If you want more personal support, see if your health insurance will pay for some visits to a therapist. I use my Medicare and every so often a firm (AbleTo) will call to see if I’m interested in working with a CBT therapist and behavioral coach. I’ve done it twice and it’s helped me a lot.

Hey Msjay,

I’ve been in this sort of situation a few times. My life as I knew it flipped and the life I knew vanished.

I moved from one country to another. I thought I’d made plans in the new country but when I got here I found those plans didn’t actually exist. I had to start from zero with nothing. I knew no one and had no cash. I had to build my own support system from scratch. First I had to establish my needs, then workout how best to meet those needs. There are many differing community services, for many differing needs, so working out what you need is a must.

So, I built a life for myself and things were travelling really well and then my brain decided to ‘hiccup’ and life as I knew it went from hero to zero. I’d already built from ‘zero’ before and I again used those skills to recreate a life, a different life, but a life all-the-same. Since that first ‘hiccup’ my brain has had a few hiccups and belches, with the last few knocking me badly, but in knowing how to build from ‘Zero’ I know I have the skills to get me through almost anything.

Technically, we all have a brain injury (BI) and there are hundreds of differing services available specifically catering to people with brain injuries (I say this because prior to my own situation I used to work for such services). BI’s can come in many shapes and forms, because of this no service can offer EVERYTHING that clients may need, so many services network with others. They do this so that they can offer a more wholistic service, often simply linking in with one service can open access to links that are often otherwise not available. Sometimes social workers at your local hospital or health service can be a good place to start. Another place to make a start is via Brain Injury USA

Brain Injury Association of America | BIAA (

They will have their own network of services and will be able to link you in with specific services within your specific area/location.

Look, I’m not going to tell you this is easy because I know from personal experience, it’s not, but those services are there to assist. Use them to your own benefit. Make your own support network.

Merl from the Modsupport Team

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