Brain Aneurysm Support Community

Its the elephant in the room

Its been so hard lately to really face this second BA’s surgery. craintomy,clipping.Iam diagnose schizophrenia, and have PTSD with trauma.So my brain just takes over my thoughts.So it’s hard not to think the worst.This is very hard to share.I some how feel embarrassed.Thank you for listening to me.

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Hello there,
Just let it be, do not over think about. it might give more stress, 'we cannot predict what is not there yet, but what I can share to you is by giving up your self up to our Lord and he will guide you to the right path. sometimes we are too worried about what is not to happen, we just invite negativity in our life. “Don’t be”

LOVE LOTS
Maes

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Hi,
You’ve been through so much. You are more resilient than you give yourself credit for. You are reaching out and you have nothing to be embarrassed about. The brain can be our best friend, but also our worst enemy at times. Whenever I start feeling overwhelmed, I have a couple of ‘tricks’ that help. 1) I stop and count to a small number like 5 or 10 over and over to stop the catastrophic thinking. This works best when trying to sleep. I essentially bore myself to sleep. LOL 2) Deep breathing where I focus on breathing OUT all the way and breathing in very slowly. I do this repeatedly until I feel calmer. I have no idea if these will work for you, but I have some luck with them.

I wish you the best going forward with your surgery. Remember, you have already demonstrated how much strength you have. You’ve got this!

Jennifer

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Hey Teresa,
I’ve been in a very similar place and it ain’t no fun. Some people are of the thought that the idea of needing brain surgery is hard, and it is. But the idea of going through all of that again can be hell (and I’ve been to hell a few times now, so I know that place.)

I ‘try’ to keep things logical with a few simple questions/answers.

           1)What control do I have? None
           2)Who has the control? The dr's
           3)What can I do about any of it? Nothing
           4)Can I change ANY of it? No

If I have control, if there’s something I can do, if I can change anything, then that’s down to me. Anything outside of those boundaries is outside of any control of mine.

You have no control over ANY of this. Do Not be feeling embarrassed with us, it’s a wasted emotion here. You should only feel embarrassment if you had any control, if you could change it yourself. Did you choose to be here? HELL NO. None of us do. But the reality is that we are here and through no choice of our own.

I have to agree with both Maes and Jennifer. If you believe in a god, then pass your cares on to him. I don’t believe personally so that wasn’t much help to me, but for those that do believe, it can be.

I do find that focusing on breathing can assist, especially for sleep. But during the day I find I have to keep myself occupied, doing something, anything. If I sit and let my mind wonder off… ….ohh hell… …I can easily end up in some awful places. I ‘try’ to have a few things to occupy myself. So then if I physically can’t ‘do’, I can occupy myself in another way and I ‘try’ to vary them so I don’t get bored.
Please note: I say ‘try’ because I’m not always successful, but if I can see myself sinking down that hole, I act to get my mind away from it.

Some may say this is easy… … like hell it is. The people who say that have never been here. Never had to deal with all of this. It ain’t easy at all, BUT, as Jennifer has said “Remember, you have already demonstrated how much strength you have. You’ve got this!” And I agree.

Just remember, we are always here if you need.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team

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Thank you so much for caring.I will try the things you shared.It has been so much help to share the things that are hardest for me.It really means a lot to be honest.Hope your doing well.I won’t forget the kindness.God Bless you!

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I would add to Jennifer’s breathing that if you breath very deeply and hold it for a count of five, then totally exhale, all your muscles will relaxe

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You really hit the nail on the head.Just realized made a joke while crying.And your all so right and that gives me hope.My biggest problem is my schizophrenia. When I had my cardiac arrest from Long-QT’s. I could no longer take the medicine I need antipsychotic that helps my mind to be in control.But if one thing that your so right about. I wouldn’t wish this on any person.So really from my Heart thank you ALL!:gift_heart:First time I can be honest and means a lot to me that you share truth.One day at a time.:rainbow::zap::partly_sunny::umbrella::relieved:

What you say is so true.Iam going to try real hard to think more positive.And trust that will all work out for my good.Thank you so much!:rose::two_hearts:

All good advice I think. Teresa, I am glad you reached out for support. These people all understand something about what you are going through. I am about 9 months out from my craniotomy and clipping. The scar and the place where I was cut are not very noticeable to others but I am constantly aware. In terms of what you are dealing with, it may be hard for us to comprehend trying to manage schizophrenia. That in itself is a challenge I would guess. But heartfelt advice here: I would not hesitate to work with qualified mental health professionals who are there to help. Do you have a regular mental health appointment? I would keep going and if possible talk about what is going on. Thanks again for writing.

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Yes, I see psychiatrist and he is very helpful. Mostly the problem is the fact that can’t take the medicine to help me. But my husband and my two older daughters are such a good support two me.I did go for trauma therapy for 8 months two years ago,that also helped a lot.It is something have not felt freedom to share with others.I have Tryed very hard to remember all the things in my life that Iam grateful for.
Thank you for you help.So very nice of you.

I pray all goes well. Try to deal with things as they come. Don’t worry about whet could happen, try to deal with what is. Take one day at a time, minute, by minute. You can’t eat the whole elephant, you have to to take piece by piece. Do try to breathe and not worry yourself.

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Thank you!It made me laugh.But also so true.Grateful for the support.